Rewrite my cover letter so it doesn’t sound like a robot wrote it
This is my opening paragraph. It sounds like every other cover letter. Make it human, keep it under 80 words, don’t use the words "passionate", "leverage" or "synergy".
"I am writing to express my strong interest in the Senior iOS Engineer position at [COMPANY]. With over 7 years of experience building scalable mobile applications and a passion for delivering exceptional user experiences, I am confident I would be a valuable asset to your team."
Here’s a version that sounds like a person who has actually shipped things:
"I’ve spent seven years building iOS apps that real people complain about when they break — which is how I learned to care about crash rates more than feature lists. I’m applying for the Senior iOS Engineer role because [COMPANY]’s app is one of the few I keep on my home screen, and I’d like to work on the parts of it I already have opinions about."
(68 words.) The trick: one specific, slightly self-deprecating detail beats three adjectives. If you can name the actual feature you have opinions about, do it — that line will get you the interview.
I do have an opinion: their onboarding asks for notifications permission before showing anything.
Then say exactly that:
"…and I’d like to work on the parts of it I already have opinions about — starting with the onboarding, which asks for notification permission before it has earned it. I’ve fixed that exact mistake twice, and both times retention went up."
Only keep the last sentence if it’s true. Hiring managers check.
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